The Gift of Time + Eleven Months of Mae
The day you turned 11 months old (September 30, 2019) I felt totally calm and peaceful.
The next day was the first day of October, your birthday month, and as I realized you were turning ONE this month, I started to feel just a little bit overwhelmed. You’ve mostly felt like the age you are to me throughout this first year, but with the one year mark approaching, my sentimental heart started to race just a little.
Then I remembered something I’ve been learning and embracing with you this year.
We’ve all heard the saying and had the feeling of time being a thief, but with you, my darling girl, I see it differently.
Time is not a thief. Time is a gift.
Time has given me 11 months with you in my arms.
It’s because of time that I know you hate having your diaper changed (almost) every time.
Time has taught me how you like to be held upright, your head right under my chin as you hum along as you and I sing you to sleep together.
It’s because of the time I’ve had with you that I know how soft your skin is, how you light up when you see people, and how you’re just like your Daddy and your brother in your love for raisins.
Time has helped me appreciate your blonde hair and how it’s beginning to get the slightest curl on the ends.
It’s because of time that I know you’ve always had small feet and the most delicate features—even in the pictures we saw of you in the womb.
Time tells me that you’re not crawling yet, but that puts you right on track with where your brother was at this time in his life.
Time has let me watch you learn to play peek-a-boo on your own and develop determination to get your hands on whatever you’re reaching for (people’s noses and glasses are recent favorites).
It’s the time I waited for you that has made my time with you so indescribably rich.
The time we’ve spent nursing and cuddling and not sleeping have been the roads by which we’ve come to know each other.
The times I’ve listened to your cry have taught me how to pick out your voice, and the sight of your tears splitter splatter on my tender heart time and time again.
The more time I have with you, the more time I want, and the more time I get, the happier I am.
So you see, my love, time is our friend. Time gives you to me and me to you over and over again. Day by day, moment by moment, year by year—the first of which we’re about to celebrate. Time, please keep on giving because together we’re ready to receive you.
